¿ONCE A HOMO, ALWAYS A HOMO?

The other day I was in Star Bucks and I saw the mother of a guy I know who is GAY but got married to appease his mother. I remember the day I found out about it I was like WTF is going on here? I mean how can she think that her son won’t want to be FUCKED by a man again? How can she want him to live a life that’s a lie so she can deal with her own demons? How can she expect him to LOVE himself or anyone else if isn’t true to himself? Do think she realizes that with a gay man in your life, color and warmth permeate your world and with that MAN being her very own flesh and blood, why would she do herself such an injustice? But I will tell her that her SON is and will always be GAY! He might have a wife but that’s in name only, he is never going to crave or desire her in the same instance as he would a man. I am the first to say that if being GAY is wrong then I accept that with a humble heart and a heavy soul. I would accept a life of burning in the fiery depths of a Christian, or an Islamic hell! How did she make him say GAY IS ONLY TEMPORARY AND THAT TODAY I HAVE AWOKEN UP WITH JUICY PUSSY ON THE BRAIN? Her behavior isn’t understandable when he was going through "GAY PUBERTY" so how could it okay since he has been dating men for years and managed NOT to have sex with any women at all? Where in his mind did he think he has to clench onto his heterosexuality? Do you think his mother knows that she forced her son to minimize his wife as a baby making machine because she wants him on the ‘right’ path? How could some grandchildren make him ‘whole?’As a mother she has committed the ultimate SIN; she killed the very essence of her SON, the very thing that makes him a MAN! How sad to think that there is some woman waiting for him with legs spread open and saying: Splash up in me and let me make you UN-GAY! This is the saddest existence a man could live because no matter how many times he FUCKS his wife, eats her pussy, KISSES her…tells her he LOVES her… he will ALWAYS be gay. Her son is so embarrassingly inauthentic and she has NO clue that he is practically in ‘STRAIGHT’ drag (@ least a drag queen knows they are playing role), but you that this is truly HER SON! His whole demeanor is simply now a learned behavior and you’d think that his problem is solved because he is now ‘HETEROSEXUAL’ but the problems has just begun, take it from ME…no matter how many times your son manages to splash up in his wife he will never convert. Your son’s life is PAINFUL LONELY & FUCK UP! He remedies his life with decadent sex that makes up for all of the ways you now make him hate himself. BECAUSE HE KNOWS, I KNOW EVEN GOD KNOWS THAT YOUR SON IS GAY! ONCE A ‘HOMO’ ALWAYS A ‘HOMO’!

GOD'S FAVOURITE HOMOSEXUAL!

Dear God,

Each day of my life,

I seek out the light of your presence,

To help guide my actions and words.

Dear God,

Each night of my life,

I look back at how I have spent my precious day.

Did I allow that still, small voice to guide my way?

Dear God,

Here I am poised on the brink of your holy presence.

Watching the sunset, which will define that moment,

When once again I focus on atonement.

Dear God,

Is it possible to be At One with you?

Can I leave behind earthly sensations,

All the thoughts of my heart streaming to you.

Dear God,

Tomorrow as I once again watch the sun set,

Hear the ancient sounds of time signal an end.

I pray I feel your presence in and around me.

Dear God,

Accept my atonement, accept my prayers.

Allow me to feel you in my body, soul, and mind.

Allow me to be At One with you, at peace with myself.

*******

I ASK THESE THINGS IN YOUR NAME AS I STRIVE TO BE YOUR FAVOURITE HOMOMSEXUAL…ON THE VERGE OF A BREAKTHROUGH I AM MANDATED BY GOD, HE PLACED A HOLD ON ME…HE HAS SHINED HIS LIGHT ON ME AND GAVE ME MY WINGS…

AS LONG AS THERE IS BREATHE...

If, when faced with the bad, when told everything is futile, I can still look up and end the conversation with the phrase... yeah....BUT, then I still have hope... Hope is such a marvelous thing. It bends, it twists, it sometimes hides, but rarely does it break... It sustains me when nothing else can... It gives me reason to continue and courage to move ahead, when I tell myself I’d rather give in…Hope puts a smile on my face when the heart cannot manage... Hope puts my feet on the path when my eyes cannot see it... Hope moves me to act when my souls are confused of the direction...Hope is a wonderful thing, something to be cherished and nurtured, and something that will refresh me in return... Never lose hope...I am a man that’s looking for a strong man with an amazing soul, centered vision and an aggressive personality to build a live with. Life is to short and precious and I can’t accept any less…I know I am on the right path, I know I will get what seeks me…I want all of a man, I want him to love me loving all of him….Guess you can call me greedy, but I want all of a man and not half…I am in it for the long haul so I have be with someone that is walking with me hand in hand…I want someone that wants to do nothing wit me and knows that we are doing everything…Some say I am living a fool’s paradise but I believe in fate and I know that universe is dealing with me…I know that as long as my mind is racing and my heart is thinking I won’t rest until I find that which is meant for me…As long as there is breathe in the body…

SEX IS WAR...SEX IS A BATTLEFIELD!

SEX is for losers,

SEX is ignoring raging hormones and burning drive to…

Fondle, suckle and thrust furiously into some hot ass!

SEX is keeping y’r groinal giblets inside y’r pants

And punch those sweaty bits into submission whenever they drip with desire.

SEX is never spilling y’r sacred "MILK"

SEX is catching a brain-rotting STD…

*************

I am talking to the man that has sex with every man he meets; he shares a bed, kisses, and hugs and reveals his whole life story in a matter of moments. He thinks any man who has sex immediately brings him closer to his destiny however, he doesn’t realize every time he gives away a piece of himself with intimacy he will always feel empty. He feels that he is doing everything right by giving into his desires and investing ALL of his energy in a man he met a few minutes ago. He quickly dives into sexual fantasyland after one kiss…Do you think he sees how his is being played out? Right at the moment of climax, he realizes that this cannot sustain him and he seeks the next person and becomes his own victim reliving the same experience. Simply patching up toxic issues; maybe it has to deal with love he didn't get as a child…maybe a relationship that broke his heart and he never recovered... maybe he doesn't love himself…Captive, his heart cannot grab what his mind won’t allow, but I know what holds him captive does not exist. How can he do battle in a land that will devour him? How can he not see SEX is just an activity that does nothing for the soul if done just for the FUCK of it? It would be nice if he was held captive by his dreams cradled in his heart; the ones that protect him and keep safe. I wish I could help him make positive choices. Show him that his sweet captivity isn’t real and he can overcome it. He can see the ruse, this imaginary story. I wish that every time he went to combat he really knew he had reason to be insecure and that when he believes that SEX is all he would see otherwise. But I guess he thinks that he and his battle will be forever…laughing, loving, talking…dreaming; funny how this can never be true and he will never understand why. But I wonder why he held to what he never wanted, why he told himself things that had no meaning…Guess he figured he had nothing to give but himself, this is his only way to feel something other than the truth staring him in face. He is held captive by a ghostly dream...One that never was, Never will be. Do you think that when his soul catches fire he should try to avoid looking in the mirror because that would throw him into a panic? When his battle is over he will be rusty from tears, cried mostly in vain? He has to shiver and shake when faced with the unknown and look for solutions to his problem and wonder if he lived selfishly not allowing LOVE into his life. At this point I say seek healing and click your heels three times and say ‘there is no place like home’ and find his way out of this battle field and into the light; seek a life that offers more than a quick moment of release but a life that is worth living…

JUS A PRISSY B!TCH

Lord I ask that when men and women read the words that I write, that it would be use to build up and influence and provoke them out of bondage, out of the chains in which holds them down, which holds them without an understanding, which holds them without love and compassion! And Lord I ask that this word would bring strength and awareness to the nation that this word is design to deliver and set free...I b the PRISSY B!TCH that you is hard to please. I am that stuck up, goody-two-shoes, self-centered and all-knowing B!TCH. I am the PRISSY B!TCH armed with a catty remark about you, your friends and anyone else that may make my day inconvenient. I have the talent to turn any minor even into a titanic pain in the ass. I know how dull and unfulfilling it is to have a man who doesn't love back, who offers no challenge or danger…I know that most MEN are ‘naturally’ half-people. I won’t settle for a man that doesn’t know what I want; I refuse to accept a man who tries to rape me of the things that make who I am! I have come to realize that men are drippy, sexless bores. I want an actual man; not a fake one, you know the type that isn’t insecure and have such a poor sense of self that they feel the only way to find some kind of identity is to perform monstrous masculinity. I know I am attracted to men that are confident. There's nothing more maddening than an insecure guy who's terrified in the bedroom and constantly worried about what I think of him. I know that a man that is insecure has no soul. I just want to FUCK I have no time to baby and pamper a MAN. I'm a man, and if I don’t like the way I FUCK and get FUCK from a man I will simply separate myself the portion of my life. I know that I AM THE BEST FUCK YOU WILL EVER HAVE! I know I have what it takes to make your roll back in your head; think about it, YOU WANT TO BE WITH ME BECAUSE YOUR MAN WANTS TO BE ME. FUCKING me leaves you feeling strong and manly. I am a warrior and I need to be with someone who is a match for me. I can appreciate a man who knows there's a whole ocean of fish out there, who isn't afraid of being himself in case he is rejected by me. Truth be told, a real man doesn't care what I think about him…he answers solely to his spirit. You know the same spirit that allows him to romp freely across the plains, raping and pillaging as he goes! With a rifle over one shoulder and blood on his mouth! There's nothing sexier than a violent, uncaring asshole. Can you say YUM? A real man don't pretend or even try to understand me, I’m actually not human. Simply love me for being the mysterious, capricious creature I am. I am a very difficult man to be with. I know I have caused MANY MEN great pain and anxiety. But hey we are all adults and ultimately it is wholly their choice whether they want to be with me or not - I cannot be anyone other than myself. I'M JUS' NATURALLY A PRISS B!TCH...I can't even try to communicate like a human being! "I am what I am!" I know that I want a MAN that challenges me to grow - professionally, intellectually, emotionally and spiritually. I believe in people being themselves and following their hearts towards whatever destiny lies before them. So don’t come half stepping cause this PRISSY B!TCH WILL SEND YO ASS PACKING!

¿R TOPS SELFISH?

I have constantly found this "homosexual lifestyle" an enigma. Many are not what they appear or say to be. Are labels (top/bottom) limiting your sexual fulfillment and is it actually selfish to want only one thing? I have been questioning myself that for years. I myself am a versatile individual and feel that expressions of love or affection should be gratifying for both parties in whatever capacity that may be. I also feel that true intimacy is giving of oneself along with receiving from what the other party is sharing.

I find that people that put themselves in a category may have a tendency to TAKE and not really interested in giving. I do understand there are levels that one is willing to share sexually depending on the situation, whether it is a one night stand, just dating, or a full relationship. Are we in fact choosing roles because of what we feel is missing in our lives ( i.e. total bottoms having the need to be subservient or wanting to please a dominant male figure that was missing…or could it be self-deprecation) Or maybe we choose or prefer the dominant role (i.e. top because this is a way of holding on to your manhood, or you have been hurt before and won't let someone top you again. Or maybe you found it painful and you refuse to do it again even though your partner has given themselves to you)

I notice when the question comes about and a man is asked are you top or bottom, many men are VERY adamant and make sure you know under no uncertain terms do they get "topped". Many times men who are bottoms are looked at as "pussy boys" or "bitches". Why is that? I think it's because we put labels on sexual position instead of it merely being a matter of what someone enjoys sexually. They are there to please the top…to serve him. I know that there are some beautiful brothers out there that really want to please a "bottom". But they are becoming more and more becoming extinct.

I often wonder if we are caught up in this fantasy of the way a partner should be (we as men tend to fantasize about idyllic situations that aren't always practical) It appears that whether straight or gay, many men tend to think they are hot shit in bed. A lot of this comes from the other party being afraid to hurt the others EGO. How many times have we heard this "I haven't had any complaints"…lol. Did you ever think that maybe the night you thought was hot will never happened again cause you didn't really satisfy your partner? I know I threw some thoughts at you. I am interested in seeing the responses. Let the floodgates open…LOL

*************

Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.

HOMOPHOBIA (R-E-S-P-E-C-T US)

WE WON'T DISAPPEAR...OUR HEARTS CANNOT RELEASE WOT IT HOLDS ON 2 Homophobia, as it should be known, it is defined as a fear (technically a phobia) and/or hate attitude toward a person because of her/his homosexual orientation. The gay community has suffered enough under the guise of a morally functional and fair society. We are literally ‘slayed’ in this modern day and age for our sexual preferences. We are discriminated against, promoted less in the workplace, unfairly judged and not accepted by members of our own families, scoffed at… and in many cases physically attacked or even killed. From a personal place, I become weary at the overwhelming amount of homophobia. It is important, from a moral place, to call a spade a spade as it were; so as to protect the integrity and rights of victims of this crime. Homophobia when manifested is a signal of deeper character problem, insecurity or fear of internal workings that perhaps are mirrored in the victim.

Funny how I think that if WE are left ALONE life would perfectly sweet; if WE stayed in WORLD and THEY stay in theirs are existence on this planet would be so lovely. Crazy how they care about what I do with MY D!CK, why is it so important to you? You ain't trying to save us...so why bother? Why give a FUCK? We are gonna LIVE OUT LOUD! Shhh! don't tell them that we know that we are all created equal under God, we are all his children and angels and we will not allow society to label, cheat, or treacherously persecute US... You see, discrimination is a seed of hatred and a process called ignorance, we are here to encourage men, women, and children to co-exist in this world. We are here to show you to co-exist without a need to build resentment, envy or hatred. I've heard and encountered some extremely small minded and conservative individuals, so I can positively assert my attention to the issue and raise awareness of this serious condition our society is in. There are those who wish to even entertain the ignorance of discrimination, but I say the best offense is an organized, faith-filled stand! I AM SLAVE TO THIS DREAM…We must make it known that God loves everyone, we love ourselves and we'll continue to live…

They would much rather see us in HELL & SUFFER...We met the devil & the deep ‘HOLY EYE’ and stare illusion eye to eye. It almost amusing...interesting…more importantly, we get an extra dose of manhood. So wish us an enternity of fire and brimstone, we are just greeting the old acquaintance that's rumored to live amongst thieves. With great respect we receive his message. No screen nor smoke…we are men that are chased by the devil with eyes wide open, wide enough to see. We sense the undercurrent of energy thrumming through the Universe; like the wind or a whisper. We are caught in what’s embellished and what is true. We are not trying to figure out the difference between me and you, we are stillness in motion…Living in perfect balance…we recognize the footsteps in the sand and stepped out on faith and take a chance.And we realize the truth’s inside the forbidden desires, the pleasurable gratification, the impressions, image and vague premonitions of world that doesn’t exist. Life is pain, we are insane…broken rules; we are the abomination that life devoured, the reason why anal orgasm exist!

Do you think they know that hatred is the anger of the weak….its is all a lie; and there is NO truth in hate?I am here to encourage you to rest in peace! God didn’t kill you but other people did. God has never stopped loving you. Your horrible deaths were not completely in vain but became a testament to love, consciousness and advocacy of the living. I hope that the impact of your life and the awakening of consciousness that you have stirred continues to live on.