Friday, July 18, 2008

LOST IN TRANSLATION...


So today I write about an end of an era, an end of time that brought much joy and pleasure to my life. Today I say goodbye to times that my friends and I shared and though it was over coffee it was so much more than that. This was the time when we got to hear about each other’s week and what is going on in our lives. And it gave me such a GREAT feeling knowing that I was apart of this all…But as of late I have come to realize that there comes a time in all our lives when we may need to evaluate our relationships, making sure that they are having a positive effect on us, rather than dragging us down. And I have come to see that my friendships were NOT even OR based on my organizing OUR weekly sessions. Now I am realizing that spent precious time AND energy engaging in friendships that let me down, rather than nourish me nourish along my path. They say that life has many twists, turns AND challenges, hence I find it difficult to entertaining anyone in my inner circle who drains my energy. Moreover, I am surrounding myself with people that does NOT get me OR refuse to see who I truly am…and that is worst than anything I could imagine for my life. Here I am trying to not only show them the path but help them walk it…yet I sit here today with the thoughts that you attract those who reflect what you are and I do NOT feel that is the case. I have an old friend that is carrying negative attitudes OR ideas that need to be let go of in order to move forward, yet she insists that energy is kept alive. Add that to another that insists on being the human bicycle (NOT THAT I HAVE A PROBLEM WITH THAT) it is just that I find it VERY sad that he feels that this is the ONLY way he can get some sort of human touch. Then I have to deal with someone that I have known for 8 years but I still don’t know him. I get that you can NEVER know someone but…I feel that I am waiting for something to come to pass that simply will NOT! I know that EVERY relationship serves its purpose and I feel that the time has come for me to say I have done what I feel I should…now it is up to them…I GUESS IN ORDER TO CHANGE TO THE STATUS QUO IS TO HAVE A HEART TO HEART, BUT WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU’VE DONE THAT YET I STILL WRITE THIS BLOG ENTRY? I DON’T SEE THIS PROCESS AS ME ABANDONING MY FRIENDS; IT IS MERELY ABOUT ME SHIFTING OUR RELATIONSHIP SO THAT THEY CAN SUPPORT ME ON MY JOURNEY RATHER THAN HOLD ME BACK…I JUST HOPE THAT I AM NOT LOST IN TRANSLATION…

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