Monday, January 25, 2016


I’m often asked by curious couples if masturbating while in a relationship is healthy, and I always say yes.  For some, the idea of practicing solo sex is seen as offensive or an admittance of not being pleasured properly, but masturbation shouldn’t be viewed in this way. By using the act in mutual practice and in solo settings, self-pleasuring can add to a sexual relationship in various ways.

Mutual masturbation builds intimacy
Intimacy requires trust in order for each person within a relationship to place themselves within the essence of another’s energy. Using mutual masturbation during sexual foreplay is a great way for couples to engage with each other intimately without entering into physical intercourse.  It’s a very intimate activity to be a voyeur of while participating simultaneously. Confidence in each other’s sexual expression and enjoyment will help unify a couple sexually helping shame that often mystifies sex to be released. Locking eyes and maintaining this gaze on each other will help to build trust in each other and send signals of desire that can heighten the experience.

It’s great foreplay
Stroking the genitals in a rhythmic way can cause sensations that arouse sexual energy.  This process is necessary for the body to go from a resting state to a place of arousal where it is ready for sexual activity. Heart rate increases, blood rushes to the sex organs making them more sensitive to the touch and hormones are released that begin the process of lubrication for women and erection for men. Using masturbation as a form of foreplay can help each partner become comfortable with viewing the other sexually and lead to a heated moment of passion once bodies are joined together.

Helps with sexual self-awareness
Too often people believe they know all there is to know about their sexual parts, but most only have a general understanding of how to use them. In order to have a command over sexual arousal one must know what spots on the genitals are the most pleasurable and how to touch them in order to feel aroused. Masturbation allows one the time to explore and learn about what touches can create feelings of euphoria that awaken erotic energy. This type of understanding of self creates a sense of sexual confidence in how to use physical techniques to get to the arousal stage of orgasm. Once you know your triggers it’s easier to tell your partner exactly what you require to feel completely satisfied during the sexual experience.

Can release stress
Living daily life can be stressful due to the demands of responsibilities and sometimes the time needed to put into sex just doesn’t seem to present itself. The process of each partner being ready for sex and completely enjoying it while it happens can be daunting, especially if each partner has a different level of libido. Some may require more sex while others are okay with having it once every two weeks.  Using masturbation as a way for each partner to receive the sexual release they desire is a healthy act, whether used in act together or solo. Encourage your partner’s self-exploration for a balanced sex life.



  1. That's still unknown for me... I believe it's fine to masturbate, it's not being unfaithful if you're doing it alone. :D Haha.

  2. I believe it to be beneficial. I love watch and be watched. A lot that was mentioned in the article have valid ground.